Monday, February 8, 2010

Beach Blanket Review Bingo!!

Word. Usually when you see a guy getting it on with an entire Peace Corps you just gotta give him grudging respect- AND pay premium prices online! A funny version? On American late night cable? Count me the heck in!

Lex Luger was the toughest kid on the block. He could knock down your little sister down the street with one well-placed lugie. He spit into the wind AND tugged on Superman's cape. Oh no he didn't. Oh yes he did.

Until Doomsday and Satan got unleashed, and they started a three-piece punk garage band called Satan and the Lugies, and history was made. Rock n' Roll Hall of Fame entry, 2040.

HitchHiker's Guild to the Universe, eh? Bet the answer to that is 24!


Moving right along... Maybe the next one will be good. Funny, religion, who knows?

Wait, you want to review a movie before you've seen it, after you've seen it? You're asking a question about posting your review as you post a fake review? I'm not a robot and my head will not explode, so cut it out!!!


Watch out with that long trail of broken hearts, Clooney. They're taking to to Netflix, and I see pain in your future.

"'The Peacemaker'? More like 'The Pacemaker'!" "'From Dusk Til' Dawn'? Oh, that's what he'll PROMISE...." "You'd be lucky if it was goats, it was more like MEN WHO STARE AT OTHER WOMENS ASSES ON OUR DATE!'" "Up in the Air? That's where he left all our plans, honey!" "I was expecting a proposal, all I got was 'Good Night, and Good Luck!" "'Three Kings'? Uh huh, it was a 'Three Inch THING!'" "Turns out it ain't a made up movie country, 'Syriana' was this stripper he was seeing...."

Psh. Women.

I had no idea the Alien vs. Predator movies went to the beach! Watch your back, Leprechaun, Annette Funicello and Frankie Avalon... the NEW heartthrobs are in town!

(Thank you so much to Insomniac Zac for this awesome photoshop!!! Not to mention supporting my blog, you are awesome, buddy. :) )


  1. Wasn't Lex Luger a pro wrestler way back when?

    Also, I am grudgingly forced to agree on the Michael Clayton review.

    Also also, 42.